Personal Problems – people seek therapy for many reasons. Here’s an outline of the common personal problems in therapy:
Do you feel emotionally and physically tense? If you also worry excessively about the future and avoid responsibilities and social situations, you may be anxious.
The good news is that therapy can help you manage and accept your anxiety. This helps you decide whether to solve the problem straight away or leave it until you can fully address it.
Do you feel you can ‘do it all,’ even if your health and relationships suffer? How realistic are your expectations of yourself and others?
Speak to a professional. It helps reduce overwhelm, create perspective and review your priorities.
If you’re already anxious, constant political uncertainty heightens your symptoms. We find ourselves compulsively checking news reports and only getting more het up.
The sudden death of a parent or partner or parent can be devastating. This is even harder to deal with, as you didn’t have the chance to prepare yourself. So how do you cope? After a few months, those around you may expect you to be more ‘over it’ than you are. Often it can take years to truly get through a sudden loss.
Grief isn’t just about death. It can occur over the loss of a dream, a lifestyle, a job, a relationship, physical and mental health. It’s hard to get your head around it. Just when you think you are feeling better, you can be jolted back by someone’s comments.
Fear of Terrorism
We see more and more news reports about terrorism. The fact that this can occur in public spaces such as bars, concerts, markets, and synagogues, can make us question our safety more.
We may avoid attending large events or visiting certain spaces. Differing views and social isolation can lead to loneliness and fear.
The trauma of sexual assault is often longstanding. Those around you may be sympathetic, but you may sense their discomfort in talking about it. Movements such as #MeToo have increased the number of people sharing what has happened to them. Strong support networks allow for this to be worked through. Therapy can be a useful resource if you find you are still struggling to deal with your experience.
Distracting Technology Use
Phone and tablet scrolling is so widespread and accepted. It’s hard to acknowledge it as an issue. But if what if more than 30 minutes a day of social media use, actually harms you? FOMO (fear of missing out)
Take a step back and reflect on what it’s actually giving you. How can you use it to increase your well-being, either through deepening new friendships or making new ones? How does this line up with your current goals? Is there something you are avoiding doing, when you are zoning out on your phone?
Comparing Yourself to Others
Social media platforms like Instagram and Facebook lead to a ready stream of ideal lives and bodies on our feeds. This isn’t a reflection of reality. But it can make it hard to feel good enough and lead to feelings of jealousy. Exploring your motivations can help you choose who you engage with.
Who and what help you feel better about yourself? Years ago, people just travelled in their old, comfy clothes. Now there is pressure to look perfectly polished on your travels, even if you don’t feel it.
Do you fret over a recurring fight with your partner? Perhaps you’ve got into a loop. Is it hard to see your part in it, “if only they’d change, it would be fine.” What if learning to really listen to your partner might help? Often we are thinking of what to say next, instead of truly taking the other person in. Here’s a link to my video on how to argue constructively.
Perhaps you can’t find the right partner for you or fear you will always be single and are unsure how to cope.
Sexual incompatibility or impotence and lack of libido can lead to misunderstanding. Where there is a mismatched desire or needing support and understanding from your partner with feeling kinky, communication can be awkward.